Today I was told I was just a 'seat warmer' and a 'time waster'
when I said I was an artist-in-residence that did not paint.
So followed lots of pondering and soul-searching and engaging with the inner critic.
An acrostic poem (or a near approximation) came to mind ...

    Here I am, Stitching with soul    
  Engaging with visitors
    Articulating with textiles 
Touching the heart

Wrestling with angels
Arranging a welcoming environment
Rummaging through fabrics (my paintbrush)
Machining with meaning
Experimenting with design
I am a woman, Running with wolves

Engagement is probably a good word to describe my day.
I engaged with my 'inner child' again
and played with paper and scissors and glue
and created paper dolls to go on the postcards.
I engaged with Julie from Alaska
who was so delighted to participate in The Yarn Bomb Project.
We sat knitting for the tree outside The Arts Village
and talking about our love for textiles.
I engaged with designer Angela Croft
who is working on a stunning interpretation of William Morris on a Queen Anne lounge suite.
She enjoys working to music
so we fiddled with the gallery I-pod
and her song of the moment, 'If Only' by Gin Wigmore came on.
I came totally unprepared today -
how does one make cloth dolls without fabric:(
So I engaged with my muse
and we used a piece of fabric given by Shari,
a scrap languishing in my 'very useful box' and an old sock waiting for repair
to make BFF.

Today I heard the tippety-tap of a yellow typewriter,
and I thought ... can words be art?
Typography. Poetry.
I wandered past the New Zealand Origami Collection,
permanently on display at The Arts Village,
and I thought ... is origami art?
Design. Manipulation.
I browsed through a selection of art and craft books in the Mosaic Gallery,
and I thought ... which are art?
Creativity. Technique.
I sat with a visitor participating in The  Yarn Bomb Project,
and I thought ... when does knitting become art?
Concept. Outcome.
I danced with my dolls,
and I thought ... we are a work of art :-)

I am finding the Cottage Gallery to be a very intimate space.
Each of the dolls tells part of my story,
like an entry in a personal journal.
Sometimes this is self-evident.
Sometimes I share their story ... and mine.

Dolls and textiles also encourage us to drop our guard.
We relax. We trust. We share.
I encounter people who are curious, vulnerable,
seeking connection at a very human and personal level.
I am graced and privileged to share in the life story of others.
For a brief time, we are soul sisters.

Today I tended to lots of loose ends ...
changed my Advent display into a riot of colour as the stilt-walkers come to town;
made running repairs on a few doll casualties;
finished the last Blue Belle so she could join the parade;
and ...
played.

I took several of the postcards advertising The Open Studios Project
and created paper dolls to adorn them.
It was a reminder to me to ...
relax
smile
reflect
be attentive
be flexible
let the mind wander - and the heart respond.

This year I celebrated Christmas with another family for the first time in my life.
I felt welcomed, included, honoured. Thank you.
There are changes afoot, too, in the Cottage Gallery.
Down will come the dolls exploring Advent.
They have been companions for the journey -
but now is time for less reflection and more celebration!
It is time for Carnivale!
Come down and visit the stiltwalkers and Blue Belles -
all in party mood!!

I am hoping to be open every day from Boxing Day until Jan 22nd
from 10am until 4pm.

Communities come (and go) for a variety of reasons.
I am, for a season,  part of a community of five women: creating and sharing.
We gathered for lunch today.
Julie Voss came along, a multi media artist from the first season of The Open Studios Project (and also my beloved daughter:-) Shari Cole, quilter extraordinaire from the second season of The Open Studios Project, also joined us. They both shared stories from their experiences at The Arts Village. I was encouraged and heartened by their presence.

I am nearly finished my first Open Studios project -
the Blue Belles celebrating life and living it fully.
They too are a community - complete in themselves,
but also connected by shape and design,
to Euphrosyne, Goddess of Joy, with whom they dance and play!

I feel my world has been turned upside down.
Instead of making dolls in the evening as a time
to relax;
to meditate;
to listen to my body, my mind, my spirit;
I am creating dolls during the day,
focusing on the doll for its own sake
rather than as an aid to transformation.
Instead of feeling rejuvenated and energised,
I am feeling tired and depleted.
To persevere,
I will need a new perspective; a fresh mind-set
that encapsulates dollmaking as a transformative process.

Today is my first day of rest since I began moving into the Cottage Gallery.
It is the Sabbath;
a day of rest;
a day of recollection;
a day of gathering;
a day of reconnection - with self, with others.

On Monday June 9th, 2009, an arsonist destroyed our textile studio.
Much was lost, much was salvaged.
At this time, I rue the loss of all our Christmas decorations -
 handmade with love, treasured tokens of my children's love.
I went down to the local opportunity shop and bought a bag of old decorations.
Today, I am hanging them again.
Gifts from a stranger. Rich in story and Christmases past.

Many of my dolls use recycled and repurposed materials.
Like my bag of decorations, their story now continues.

dis·ci·pline  (ds-pln)
n.
Controlled behaviour resulting from disciplinary training; self-control.

I thought about discipline, especially self-discipline, today.
I considered how much our environment shapes our behaviour.
I weighed this against the importance of my own character training and attitude.
I am a procrastinator by nature ... and sometimes by choice!
I quite willingly allow myself to be distracted by people, sounds, smells, day dreams.

I want to fulfil the potential offered by a dedicated studio and display place,
but I also need the vagaries and variances of each day
to nurture and fertilise new ideas and processes.
So I imagine this arts residency will be a daily juggling act
between busy-ness and day-dreaming, 
focus and dilly-dallying,
interaction and retreat,
all the while allowing my soul to sing:-)